Wednesday, 13 July 2011

Pre-Political Procrastination Post

Urgh, I think a serious on-topic post is required.  I have been relentlessly procrastinating. And this post I continue the trend. Unfortunately historical battles, world politics and religious debates are nowhere near as interesting as they were when I was 12 years old and the alternative was playing dos games and suffering the abuse of my evil stepmother. I mean honestly, who wants to care about the problems of the world when you can watch youtube videos like this one (but go watch the miley cyrus video first if you haven't seen it already

Watching this video just makes me want to become a full time cannabis addict. You know, just leave everything behind move to some agrarian third world country with lax drug laws and grow fields of it so I can have big bonjwa bonfires of bitches getting baked, singing about hubcaps and trigonometry.

Alas, that's all too much effort for me. That and I do not smoke cannabis. Never have, never will, do I think it should be legal? Yes. But do I smoke it? No. Do I really want to write about serious business when I have this pro-narcotics parody playing in my head? Definitely not.

I really don't see how the next generation is going to learn anything when they have such wonderful technological distractions at their fingertips. I have actually resorted to using starcraft to teach my nephew long multiplication. Eg, "If you have 33 battlecruisers in your death fleet and each battlecruiser costs 400 minerals and 300 vespene gas, how much does your fleet cost in total?". Amazingly, it worked. Maths is fascinating when annhilation is involved.
Battlecruisers, not to be confused with CattleBruisers

I for one fear the prospect of my nephew ever getting his hands on that many battlecruisers. Not because it would make him the most feared and technologically omnipotent 9 year old nerd in the world, but because in order to do so he would have to mine 13200 minerals and then proceed to kill off all the workers who mined all that money for him.

See 33*6=198.  Which means in order to have that many ships, he would have to kill all but two workers in order to stay under the 200 supply cap.

And if you don't understand any of that then don't worry about it, I'll go back to babbling.

I have already implied the next post will not only be on topic but about politics. It doesn't have to be though. Because I am horribly uncreative but also because I care about you readers and want to cater to your interest, I would like to give you some choice in the utterly boring fascinating stuff you read about in my blog.

So what will it be? politics? religion? war?
 Any particular thing you want me to write about?

If it's politics and you are not fussed then I shall probably blog about the ever eternal fountain of cringing that is climate change policy. If religion, then I will relentlessly flame the abrahamic religions. If war then I will talk about the Mahratta-Mughal conflict in India. Because Mughals are better than muggles, especially since Rowling became a serial killer by murdering all the good characters in her Harry Potter series. And yes I saw the most recent Harry Potter movie and it's terrible. It's full of boring blue backgrounds and dead spots.

 So what do you feel like reading next?


  1. Agreed, you don't even have to smoke cannabis to see that its not nearly as harmful other legal drugs. However, you seem pretty strong willed on not trying it, although I would like to some day.

  2. I want to hear more about CattleBruisers, so tempted to cow tip in high-school but never had the nerve.....never close enough to a sleeping cow either.

  3. I love your off-topic posts when they're not about Starcraft.

    And I'm already in the third world country with the lax drug laws so...this is sad because I have nothing new to look forward to.

  4. How about the Greek debt crisis? Do you think they would be in a better position if they smashed less plates?

  5. That song was better than the original version, not hard though. Religion.

  6. Third world country with lax drug laws ftw.